Ummm - I love my port.....

I think I have made at least 2 other posts complaining about my port - but I would like to revise my opinion.

Last time I was at chemo, there was a young man in my pod who was attempting to get chemo. I say attempting because while I was there 3 separate nurses tried a couple of times each to access his veins. His veins were good, but he is very 'valvy' so they couldn't get the needle in the right spot. Every time they poked him, they were wriggling the needle around to avoid the valves. He was sucking in his breath like all the air in the room would disappear so I KNOW he was experiencing a lot of pain.

It made me very grateful for this weird bumpy thing in my chest. And I long ago grew accustomed to the feel of it there so there isn't much to complain about.

For today's Herceptin, my nurse missed the port. So she poked in the needle too low and so had to pull it out and try again. Lucky me - I got a double poke today. Plus, yesterday they did bloodwork on me so another needle. It is amazing how non-needle scared I am now.

Today I was talking to a 39-year old woman in the chemo room who had a 10cm tumour and was getting chemo before surgery. I am pretty sure that the size of that tumour makes her cancer Stage 3 or more which is a scary proposition. It made me thankful that I found my lump when I did and its 3cm size is nothing compared with hers...

I guess you can always find someone in a worse situation than you, right? Since I spend quite a bit of time at the hospital, I often find myself wondering things - like while I waited to see the oncologist, I saw 2 patients outside in the courtyard enjoying the sunshine with some family. They were in wheelchairs and looked to be fairly severely incapacitated. I may have had cancer, but at least I can walk and move around of my own free will and not be reliant on a wheelchair. Are they looking at me and thinking, "I may need a wheelchair but at least I don't have cancer"? Things that make you go 'hmmmmmmmmm'

I am home for a week - imagine that! Then Cam and I are off to Oroville for the long weekend to see a couple of my Desert Hot Springs pals. I'm quite excited to see them again and check out a new place.

Then I hope to return to Tulameen in August, and then I'm going to Calgary for a week. This summer is WAY better than last summer!

Making the most of it.

I have to say that with the hardest parts of my treatment over, and the good weather finally arriving and the fact that I am off work until my entire treatment is complete (which could be around Feb/Mar) - I am really going to pack as much as possible into this summer.

Let's face it - last summer SUCKED. From finding the lump in June to having surgery at the end of August - last summer was a blur. I couldn't even remember if the weather was any good. So I am making up for it this summer, and I kind of feel like I earned it with all the crap I've gone through.

So I am taking full advantage of my time off - especially since it won't be long before I'm incapacitated again with more surgery. He told me they couldn't even begin to consider scheduling a surgery until 2 months after radiation finishes to see how my skin is doing & decide what to do. And I've already mentioned that he is anticipating problems with my reconstruction.... dammit.

To Cam's great relief, I stopped buying truckloads of bras several months ago when I realized that there is a very good chance that my 'good' breast will be reduced yet again during the reconstruction. No point stocking up if I need a whole new set.

Anyway, we got home on Monday from our trip to Oregon and then on Tuesday I had my heart scan then jumped in the car with sis to head back up to Tulameen. We had a great relaxing time and the boys joined us on Thursday then headed home Sunday. Shelly & I came home Monday evening. We celebrated her birthday there by going to the Princeton Air Show and then to Dairy Queen - then had her requested birthday dinner of ribs and corn on the cob. The dogs had a blast swimming in the lake & Cooper made friends with almost all the neighborhood dogs.

My travel plans are carefully fit in between all the damned doctor appointments and chemo....

The Heat is FINALLY off.....

So just in the last couple of days my radiation burns have taken a turn for the better. They got much much worse than the last photo - but the oozing has stopped and the red heat is actually gone.

It was so red and hot before that you could physically feel the heat coming off it. Of course, it simply equates to the worst sunburn you've ever experienced so you all know how uncomfortable it can get.

Now that it is to a comfortable stage again, I feel I can move around. Movement and sweating were NOT happy things in that condition so I have been extremely sedentary the last couple of weeks. The odd walk with the dog while in Tulameen but generally a lot of sleeping, reading and campfiring.

Had my 8th Herceptin on Friday also.

Yesterday I had the pleasure of experiencing 4th of July in Birch Bay at a gorgeous property owned by a friend (thanks for the invite!). So I almost bailed out since I wasn't looking forward to a long border lineup but I'm glad I changed my mind at the last minute and endured the 50-minute line-up going down. I didn't come back until 1 in the morning so there was no line-up on the way back.

Americans are CRAZY with their fireworks. And since the cabin is right on the beach, you can see the whole bay and everyone was lighting off fireworks for hours and hours. Of course, this spoiled me for any fireworks display in Canada now, but it was well worth it. Fireworks and giant bonfire complete with wienies and marshmallows. It was probably the best 4th of July I've ever had....

We're leaving for Oregon on Wed night for an extended weekend whose point is flyball - so yes - Cam will actually be with me this weekend!!! It will be like a 2nd honeymoon ha ha. Will be back Monday night. We're taking in the Southern Washington & Oregon coasts before heading in to Salem for the tournament. I'm looking forward to it.

Off to the dentist so until next time!!!

RELAX - it's just an armpit....

It is difficult to orient oneself in the photo - but I was photographing my own armpit - not as easy a task as it may sound! The raw patch is at the bottom of my pit. It looks even worse now than when I took the pic. And YES, it hurts. I have some other delicious looking spots on my fake boob but thought that this picture was graphic enough already....

So - the good news is that radiation officially finished on Thursday. The bad news is that I have a couple more weeks of suffering as the radiation 'keeps working' (the way we are choosing to look at it rather than 'keeps causing me pain'). I have Flamazine cream for the open raw bits (like the giant blister that formed on the breast part after I stupidly wore my silicone synthetic insert without realizing it would not be good for the delicate skin). Plus that gross raw open bit in my armpit. I also have hydrocortisone cream for the itchy parts, and then I have a thick 'basic' cream for straight moisturizing. This is a very messy venture.

PLUS, they told me that I should be keeping this stuff open to air as much as possible so I've been semi-streaking a lot around the house. Since Cam renovated, the blinds are not up in my kitchen so I have to keep some sort of covering on or else risk alienating the neighbours. So I drape a light scarf-like fabric around my neck to hang in front of the scary bits but leaves the armpit open to the air.

Armpits are 'chafy' places. This isn't the most fun I've ever had in my life. And my skin was doing REALLY well right up until that blister arrived, then the armpit went haywire so I guess it all caught up with me - as they predicted.

I will be much happier in a coupleo of weeks when this horrible raw openness disappears.

To take my mind off the pain, I am going up to Tulameen to meet Suzanne at her cabin there. The gals 'bacheloretting' it for a few days.... plus I'm going to take Cooper with me since he loves his mom the best of all.

Today I went to Costco to pick up one of my numerous prescriptions & it is nearby to my friend's flower shop. I stopped in to see her and lo & behold she was in the middle of doing a giant Indian wedding. They delivered all these flowers there yesterday to be used for some thing or other, and now they were all picked up again to be picked over and redistributed into brand NEW arrangements (using some of the old flowers). Her shop was overrun with masses of colourful arrangements. She insisted I take one of them home & 'repurpose' it. So I did - and it was so big that I now have about 4 or 5 vases of beautiful flowers distributed throughout my house. And I'm not even here for the weekend! I hope Cam enjoys them.....

Lots of lilies (which never were my favourite due to the strong smell - but they are growing on me...ha ha)

Now that radiation is finished, I have to start taking Tamoxifen - which is an oral drug I'll be on for FIVE years..... can't wait to learn the side effects of that one.... (sarcasm)

Later Hosen!

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A Hair Raising Experience

Well, I think it can be said that I finally have hair. I have been telling folks that I no longer look like a cancer patient - I now simply look like a lesbian. (not that there's anything wrong with that)

I mentioned this to friends on the weekend and rather than the usual small chuckle, I received complete agreement from some people. Of course, others who live in the west end quickly corrected it to explain that if someone were paying attention they would realize that the pink toenail polish and the wedding ring would confirm otherwise. Personally, I'm not so sure. I know I can delve into the stereo-typing, however, I am convinced that there ARE lesbians who wear pink toenail polish. (and wedding rings for that matter)

Anyway, the point is, my hair is growing back quickly. As evidenced here:




As far as radiation goes, I have been developing some redness to my skin and the itchiness persists - but not the drive-you-crazy kind. It's almost more dangerous than that kind because then you KNOW you're not supposed to scratch it. When it's mild itchiness, you forget it's because of radiation and you just scratch it without thinking about it. They don't like you to scratch it.

Had my 7th Herceptin on Thursday. Nothing interesting to report there. Except that I told the nurse some interesting words & phrases my mom taught me. NOPE - not sharing because it will be embarrassing for her.... ha ha - and now your imaginations will run rampant and probably think up things way worse than what really happened. I'm evil.

My ball team had a tournament this weekend. I did not play in it - I only managed it. However, my managing skills are suspect because we can't seem to get past the first round of single knock-out. Grrrrr. Oh well, the team had fun and the sun was finally out on Saturday - although it was pissing down with rain this morning. It was funny seeing everyone out there burnt red from yesterday all glowing in the downpour. (me, warm & dry in the dugout diligently keeping score).

I think I have only 2 more weeks of radiation to go. I've been told that you don't start to feel really tired until the actual radiation is finished. They did warn me that side effects from radiation persist after you finish the actual zapping.

Next weekend is a flyball tournament on the island which I will be watching. Not sure if Molly will be playing as she is limping today and we don't know why.

On Thursday, mom and I got pedicures before all my treatment. The lady offered free threading for new clients. Can you believe it? I actually had enough eyebrows to warrant threading!!! The pedicure was great and it was only $25. She has an at-home spa (Pamper Day Spa 778-855-3333 in Fleetwood). She also gave me a massage on Friday and I thoroughly enjoyed it. http://pamperdayspa.yolasite.com/ She does gift-certificates too - but her only stipulation is that she works only with women.

Well, that's it I guess. Until next time!

Mirror Image

So this is me about to enjoy a taco salad at the Black Bear Diner in.... I forget what city.... Maybe Carson?

Anyway, it looks like a mirror behind me, but really it's just a bald guy at the next booth. HA HA HAH AH HA HA HH AH AHHA HA HHAH A